Happy Mother's Day

Today, in the UK, we are celebrating Mother's Day, and we celebrated International Women's Day earlier in the week. Perhaps it is apt that this week I was recommended a book called "The Female Brain". I was so compelled by the recommendation that I subsequently bought the book; I have been unable to put it down and I have almost finished it three days later (not easy with two small children).

Why is the book so good? It details the chemical reactions in a woman's brain from the age of an eight week foetus through to post-menopause. In essence, it's a high-brow "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus". But through case studies and explanation of women's behaviour, the book is both funny and credible. It has really reasonated with me.

So, what has this to do with Mother's Day? Well today, when my OH woke up this morning, he decided that he wanted to clear the loft. To cut a long story short, we cleared our bedroom Wednesday night, as our wardrobes were being fitted Thursday. By the end of the day on Friday, they were only a third completed, with no completion date in sight. I was mightly impressed when my OH took the view that "This is an opportunity"; I am always happy to share my optomistic approach to life where my glass is always more than half full.

My OH made clear his expectations from the start: we were going to "rationalise" what we stored up in the loft. In reality, the majority of stuff that I store up there are the kids toys that are "on rotation" or old kiddies clothes that I just haven't got around to sorting out and putting on e-bay yet. And then there's loads of other stuff that's been up in the loft forever. Naturally, I didn't want to get rid of my of bits, and we both knew that we would be having a heated discussion over said items.

But an interesting thing happened. We made an initial sift of what was going to be thrown away. We calmly debated our difference of opinions on certain items. And that's when the watershed moment happened: I agreed that if the OH wanted to throw out this particular suitcase that I was attached to, then he would have to sacrifice the vanity mirror that he had bought for me and I had never used. After having made this deal, I felt librated. Suddenly I was able to let go of items that I had been holding onto for years, without fuss, regret or tears.

Now, before I had read "The Female Brain", I think I would have thought that the fact that I was still suffering from a cold was the reason for this act of insanity. However, I now realise that by making this deal, my brain had a chemical reaction: prior to making the deal, my brain was flooded with the chemicals that make mothers anxious, nuturing and protective (part of our flight / fight response). It was these set of chemicals that made me want to keep everything that I had squirreled away. But post decision, I believe I was filled with testosterone which meant that I could be brave and reckless. We were able to substantially reduced amount of items that we store in the loft. Overall, a job well done for Mother's Day.

So that was my Mother's Day. How was yours?